One thing I have learned over the last 10 years in business is that there are always going to be people who take shots at you to either knock you down or build themselves up…People that speak negatively of you or your business, those that try to sabotage you, competitors that copy and steal from you. In the words of T-Swift “Haters gonna hate”. Period.
In the fitness profession, and specifically in the Pilates industry, individuals are quick to point out everything their competitors are not…”They do not teach Authentic Pilates”…”They do not train any professional athletes”…”Their location is not as nice as mine”…”They do not have the amount of training that I have” etc.
The truth is that if you are making an impact on people’s lives, you will (not might), attract haters. So my advice would be that if you don’t want people speaking ill of what you do or putting you down then don’t speak, don’t write, don’t blog, don’t podcast . . . oh, and definitely don’t practice a non-authentic form of Pilates.
This philosophy however only serves to hold us back from living up to our true potential. There have been many times that I have second guessed business decisions because I thought someone smarter than me, more talented or better educated had already thought of or tried it. But I realized that doubting myself was getting me nowhere…it’s like Wayne Gretsky once said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take!” There are always going to be people that don’t like or support what you do…but life is short…Haters Gonna Hate so take the shot anyways!
In an article on Huffingtonpost.com it was noted that some of the fiercest “hating” is seen amongst female entrepreneurs. The one experience commonly shared among female business owners is dealing with women who instead of supporting one another’s success, compete with or sabotage each other. Mia Redrick a successful business coach believes the strong competition often seen amongst women in business is either fueled by jealousy, insecurity or an inflated-ego (which unfortunately I have often found to be true within the fitness and wellness community).
I believe we shouldn’t view other women’s success as a threat to our own but rather a motivator that we too can achieve the same results. As Sheryl Sanders once said “ There is enough room at the table for all of us” and I would add, “If there isn’t enough room at the table then we just need to get a bigger table”.
Over the years I have developed a few strategies to help me deal with the haters out there. Here are just a few that might help you navigate through the negativity:
- Do not allow people that put you down to drain any emotional energy from you. Keep your eye on the prize and don’t let them distract or discourage you from your mission. For every hater, there are twice as many people who will support and appreciate you.
- Learn to “Shake it OFF”. The haters shouldn’t be what deter you; they should be what fuels you. Let that be the motivation that keeps you pushing forward. I heard a prominent female business owner once say that you know you’re heading in the right direction when you feel the arrows from your haters aimed at your back.
- At one point early on in my career I was really struggling with the negativity I was getting from other like-minded professionals. One of my clients sent me a card that had the following quote “One week they’ll like you, the next week they’ll hate you, but just remember that both weeks you get paid.”
- Whatever you do in life there will always be people that will not be supportive but try not to let that get under your skin. Remember that they wouldn’t be talking about you if you weren’t doing something right. So instead of getting angry, defensive or trying to prove a point kill them with kindness and bury them with success.
Haters gonna hate, no matter what you do. But if you’re dong something good the number of supporters will far outweigh the negative Nancy’s. You will never be able to control what other people say or write or post so spending time on something you cannot control is wasted energy. Your energy is better spent creating new and supportive relationships that will foster success. So ignore the negativity and create your dream! Then continue to turn that dream into reality.